Wrestling with Evil — or Fleeing from It?

[sl] I hate writing in this blog. I only write when something powerful forces me to do so. In this case, it is because I see with horror how things in our world relate to that place we call Real Life.

Mykyl, I am sorry if we upset you last Saturday. And I believe FD is sorry too; from the e-mail he sent me, it seems he was much affected by your post. ... "All she did is sigh and didn't say anything truthfully I am not sure if I will be going back to PHC anytime soon.. I also thought Mykyl had clue why I was doing this project but now I feel like she didn't understand anything:("

The problem lies deeper than this though.

[rl] Let me tell you a story that happened some years back. I was in a pub one evening with a large group of colleagues, something I don't do very often. The beer was flowing and people were getting happy. One guy, who was an entertaining but controversial character — let's call him Beta — started telling a story about horrible things that another guy, Gamma, had done. Being very naive, I swallowed the story eagerly, saying "Oh my gosh! Really?" as I listenened. It hadn't occurred to me that maybe Beta was drunk and his tale was not to be taken literally.

Much later on, I was talking to another friend of mine, a small and shy person, to whom I will give the pseudonym "Delta". The conversation turned to Beta, and quite unexpectedly, Delta said, "I don't like Beta. He said some horrible things about one of my friends, which were completely untrue." Now, "don't like" was unusually strong language for Delta, who, as I said, was small and shy and polite. Again, my immediate response was: "Oh my gosh! Really?"

Later on I reflected upon these events. It seemed likely that Delta was talking about what Beta had said at the pub that night; I knew Gamma to be one of Delta's friends. I recalled that Delta had been present at the gathering. Now, if Delta knew the story to be false, why, then, did he not speak up and expose the untruth, to preserve the honor of his friend Gamma? Even if he hadn't been present, couldn't he have requested a public apology from Beta after finding out what had been said?

In today's world, courage is not necessarily about dying for one's country/crusade/jihad, about performing dangerous feats without safety nets, or about defending oneself from armed robbers. Courage can be about speaking the truth on behalf of your friends, or at least, what you believe to be the truth. Courage, however, is a side issue. The point is that we each have an implicit responsibility to defend our friends from evil (such as slander).

[sl] Now let us turn to last Saturday's incident. Insofar as the "evil" we were presenting was fictional:

Mykyl, you wrote: "I have chosen to share that light in the form of Faeria.... I did not like even the portrayal of evil there, it just seemed wrong to me — but I made a choice between letting my own darkness lash out at them and simply walking away and letting it be."

If Faeria is truly a light, and if you are truly Queene, then it is within your power to prevent evil (even perceived evil) happening in Faeria, and to replace it with light and happiness. In fact, it is part of your duty.

I believe FD intends his story is to have a happy ending. It appears to be so, from the Introduction to his adventure story... HAS ANYONE EVEN READ the drafts of his adventure story?! ... :

... There is only one group of friends that exist to me within my reality who has any hope of overcoming the dark forces that taken over Third Life and bringing back the forces of friendship, creativity and teamwork back to the grid. ...

Queen Mykyl is secret member of the order but also the Queen of Faeria, she is in charge of creating garden like Villages in middle of dark chaos of the Third life grid providing refugee, friendship, guidance and magic to all who stumble upon her or in need of her protection.

For the story to have a happy ending, the characters must somehow "shed their evil robes" and return to the light. Queen Mykyl, your role was clearly spelled out for you. (I was going to write, "If you don't feel comfortable pretending evil, why don't you be a good guy instead?" Then I read FD's draft carefully and saw this.) FD didn't intend you to "turn evil briefly before being rescued"; you were supposed to be the rescuer! Instead, you chose to "walk away and let it be"....

By the way, I'm not talking about military intervention here — "Oh, let's go nuke the terrorists and the Axis of Evil until there's none of 'em left!" I'm talking about using the gentle voice of love. FD's adventure story — HAS ANYONE EVEN READ THE DRAFT? — is not a fairy tale where the Good Guys and the Bad Guys duke it out and the Good Guys eventually thrash the Bad Guys. The evil that FD writes about is subtle and mysterious. It is more about corruption of the mind, about "lies", "thoughts that make all who hear turn against all the hold dear", than any sort of physical violence. FD's good is not victory, glory, majesty, triumph, fireworks, flags flying high; it is friendship, creativity, balance, fairness and truth.

The gentle voice of love. That brings me to the most important section of my post:

[rl] SL is a mirror of RL. Yes, FD's story is supposed to be a story. But there is something real behind it too. FD has been talking about "evil FD", the little voice in his head that tells him he is upset and frustrated, that he is powerless to do anything. Catherine has been increasingly moody, depressed, and violent for the last couple of weeks.

(To the reader:) When you see people behaving "evilly", how often do you stop and ask yourself why they are behaving that way? Have you tried to understand them at all? Understanding doesn't necessarily mean that you find justification for their behavior, and start doing it yourself. Understanding gives you a chance of being able to help them.

[rl] Let me tell you another story that happened some years back. My life was falling to pieces. I was moody, perpetually tired, plagued with nightmares, and beginning to show signs of violence and hostile behavior — "evil", in fact. I had three or four friends from my musical volunteer group, which I was still participating in. We were not all that close at that time. They only saw me once or twice a week. Nevertheless, they became concerned about me. I had started glaring at them and telling them I hated them, for no reason. One night we were sitting in a cafe, where we were regulars. They asked me how I had been. I said, I had watched Big Cat Week on tv every day at the same time, and it was so nice to see the cheetahs and the little lion cubs, and then I put my face in my hands and started sobbing for no apparent reason. They said, this isn't normal, we worry about you, you have to see a doctor. Which doctor are you registered with? Make an appointment to see her. Promise us that you will make an appointment. We won't stop bugging you until you do it. We'll call her on your behalf if you prefer. We care about you. ... I made an appointment. The two of my friends who were able to make it met me in town and walked there with me. They sat with me during the consultation. After asking gentle questions and taking notes, the doctor said it was clear that I had clinical depression; she gave me a prescription for Citalopram, 20mg a day, to take to a pharmacy, and arranged for me to see a cognitive-behavioral therapist. My friends hugged me and let me cry on their shoulders as they walked me home.

Catherine has been increasingly moody, depressed, and violent for the last couple of weeks. Her friends say they care, but the feeling isn't the same as what I had with my RL friends. I'm really thankful they were there when I needed them. They didn't "simply walk away and let it be."

[sl] I can't be bothered, but I thought of putting on this blog a photograph of me committing seppuku, replete with blood and gore, and this caption: "If this bothers you, go dancing to help yourself forget about it."

[rl] Well, "walk away and let it be" is a common attitude in our society.

This is the attitude of our society that allowed Cho Seung-hui to go through life the way he did and to achieve his everlasting fame.

This attitude I do not like.

This attitude is evil.